A Reflection on my classmate essay

After I read my classmates essay, I found that we need to do more practice on writing, because we often use Chinese thinking to write English essays. There are some differences between Chinese and English. First, you need to write clearly and avoid making ambiguity. In Chinese, we can omit Subject. But in English, a sentence without a subject can’t be a complete sentence. Second, we need to be care of using singular verb or plural verb which is connected with the subject. Third, put punctuation marks in the right way. It is easy to make a comma splice. Think twice before you want to put punctuation mark. It is a good way to learn English in writing. We can learn our writing ability from our classmates’ mistakes. Some of my classmates don’t know how to write the topic sentence or they even don’t know a paragraph is start from a topic sentence. It is really important to know how to write a good topic sentence because a topic sentence can tell the readers what the whole paragraph want to talk, or attract readers to read the essay. A complete essay inclusive three main factor that are: Topic sentence, supporting details, and concluding sentence. We need to introduce our topic, give details to support our topic, retell the thesis statement and give the conclusion. We don’t need to use very difficult word. A good essay is not determined by use tough words or sentences. The point is that we need to use right words to let reader understand what we want to say, without guessing the meaning. After I read Jean’s essay I found that she has the same problems with me. We often have some comma splice. We don’t know when we need to use the comma. After teacher correcting our mistakes I understand that we sometimes use a comma to connect two sentences. We need to use a conjunction to connect two sentences, instead of use a comma. I can learn a lot from her essay. Her essay reminds me that we need to notice our tense and correct format. The tense must be coincidence. When we using past tense, and we need to use past tense to the following sentences. Use correct format is important. Beginning the paragraph need to indent five spaces. The title need to capitalize. Also, we need to add our vocabulary. Try to avoid using the same word in an essay. Take one of Jean’s essays for example. In “Desktop Computers and Notebook Computers”, at first, she can separate her essay as five parts. In first paragraph, she can write about some computer’s functions and tell the differences between desktop computers and notebook computers. It can let the readers realize what this essay want to talk about is. Tell about three different things between desktop computers and notebook computers. The price, conveniences, and computer’s life span are the main differences between them. In the second paragraph, discusses the price between two different types of computers. Add some details about the note computer’s price are higher than desktop computers. Nowadays people prefer desktop computers or notebook computers. Some of related questions can be write in this paragraph. In the third paragraph, talks about those notebook computers are more convenience than desktop computers. We can take our notebook computers to anyplace. We can save our time to do our homework on the computer even when we are waiting the bus. Although notebook computers are convenience, it has a disadvantage that is easy to be stolen. In the fourth paragraph, talk about desktop computer’s life span is longer than notebook computers. Desktop computers are not only cheaper than notebook computers but also desktop’s life span is longer than notebook’s. Make sure each paragraph have specific topic sentence, than you can start to write the conclusion. The conclusion must fit in with the title. Rewrite the main point and give more detail. Actually, I think my essay has improved a lot. Every time, when I get my essay correct by out teacher. I try to revise my mistake, and remember not to make the same mistake. I feel happy that my essay has improved a lot, although it is very hard to write a good essay. I know it is worthwhile. (714)黃琪雅MANDY